Its been a LONG time...

 

Just wanting a place to keep track of me... photos, journaling and accountability.  

My daughter has inspired me...in this heat, she has been getting up early to walk/jog.  I can't do the early morning yet but on weekends until it cools off I want to try to walk some.  Yesterday morning I got a 20 minute walk in and today Michael and I walked at the river bottom.  It's been so long since I've been down there, things have changed a lot...especially no water in the river!  We need rain desperately, but for the walk more shade was much appreciated.  I'm about 7 months with my new left hip and I need to get out there more to walk but over 100 degrees is too much for me.  

Not much alive and thriving outside in the gardens and I usually hide from garden work when it is this hot!!

I haven't been doing a lot of knitting these past years but I do crochet..I have a few baby blankets going right now.  While I was recovering I caught up on some projects and played around with embroidery work which I haven't done since I was a kid..it was fun!  

Since writing here I have had two sets of chickens...all but 1 of the first set...started during cold down time...March 2020...are gone.   I have 4 of the newest batch left.  The heat has been brutal! Some of these are gone...

Enough for today...have chores to do in spite of the heat!

Maybe I'll try this again...

...not that it gets read but just to journal. It's been a nice few days, extra time with Sean. Michael took off for a fishing tournament with Donald. Ashley spent the week with mom at Port A. Sean stayed around with me to play his video games and work at Le Chat Noir. Yesterday we went to San Antonio and shopped for wedding clothes for Sean, in the way out I managed to find something for me. Dress, shoes and jewelry...I had thought I'd already found mine. Oh well 😉. Looking forward to William and Chelsea's wedding this weekend!

Just finished this...it was good!


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Shades of...What?

Today on the news ...who will be playing the main dude in "Shades of Grey" . On TV...on the RADIO...my kid asks..."Why are they making a movie about that?  Isn't it bad?"  That's a good question....Isn't it?  Even if you read the books and loved them.  I started the first one and didn't finish it as I was offended.  I am by no means perfect...I have so many faults and regrets that I have a vault full of them.  I have things I wish I could change about my past and my NOW.  I remember getting a hold of a book that was considered "risque" when I was a 5th grader, ha...it was nothing compared to what a kid would learn if they got a hold of a copy of Shades. And I'm sure many have.  Is this what we want our daughters and nieces to believe to be a true relationship between a man and a woman?  Is this what we want our sons and nephews to think is a man's role in love and relationship?  Granted, I didn't finish reading the book or the series, it may ;have had a lesson in it or a good story...but do we have to be so graphic in life to be entertained?  Myley Cyrus got slammed for swinging on a wrecking ball in the nude (I helped slam)...but its ok for kids moms to go on about books like Shades of Grey?  Again, I'm not judging...by no means...I just am not understanding why this is ok.  Back in the day, you could see women reading "Romance" novels...and you wondered about them...they aren't real life either...but they were a fairly innocent excape into a fantasy world, and they didn't shout from the roof tops that they read them...I guess I just don't get it...and I will be honest and tell my kids my feelings on it.  And try to teach them what a relationship between a man and a woman should be.  I was impressed that my kid got that it was bad...thank you LORD!

Roller coaster

What a day... What a week. Never truer could this cute prayer I ran across be.




Yes it's silly. But there are days that this is so true. I'm lucky that I truly believe that The Lord is the One that is truly the answer to that statement... But sometimes coffee and wine get us to the point where we can see again. ☺️ Yes I am bad, but try not to abuse it. And Jesus did turn water into the finest wine now didn't he. Wow, now that opens up thoughts and can send me in a totally different direction. He can take those not so good moments in a day. ( ok make it full days. Oh. Crud... A week) and show us blessings when we truly need them. Like the gift of flowers and a big smile from someone that I would like to get to know better, thanks Bette...the prayers helped too.




The fact that last night was such a fun night with my amazing kids. I see on Facebook parents who
Are proud of what their kids do so well and that is just wonderful. Truly. But I am so proud of my kids hearts. I'm proud of their bravery...and their caring and empathy for others. You can be the smartest and the most athletic but if you've never had to feel pain, or understand what it's like to be heartbroken, different, whatever your difference may be in life then .. Well it's just sad. Empathy can break your heart.. I know. You can be absolutely aggravated with someone but somehow find a way to love anyway...bless in spite of.. And hope for growth and the Lords will. Feeling that strongly can shut you down and make life difficult. But I can't imagine not "feeling" as strongly as I feel about people, things and ideas. I worry about those closest to me and what they think. Yes. I may seem crazy to them. But I care and love fiercely and will forgive and understand any fault. I am in no way perfect. And yes, my poor guardian angel has had to work overtime ... But God has shown me great love and forgiveness and for some reason he has saved me from myself. I pray He does that for my amazing kids and I still can't believe that they were sent to me for a time. He must love me a lot.
My mom just jumped on a plane early this morning to visit Judith in Red River. There were a few years after the kids got a little older and before the job, that I was able to tag along. It was the best of times. Trips I will never forget spent with women that I am so blessed to have in my life. Judith, I love you and hate that I'm not there with you and mom. Pretend I'm there on the sofa helping with knitting. I love you both so much. You have made a huge impact on my life and I hate that you are so far away. Hopefully we can get there this summer. Hugs. Have a great time. Remember past times and make new memories and know that I love you both.
Enough of the pity party...and the blessings party as this post has gotten way too long. But it has been cleansing...healing...and a few tears never hurt a thing. God bless whoever reads this. Rest in His arms and feel His love. And try a taste of the best wine that He created for us to share.
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Paths Cross...

I am so thankful for all of those wonderful people that I have crossed paths with in my life.  I learned at an early age that we have no control over what happens to us and that we are to take each stage in our lives and learn how to fit it in and learn from it.Not only have I learned so many lessons from others....everyone of you...now matter how brief the time was...you have made an impact on my life.  I've learned over the years that seeing the person...truly as God sees is the key...loving, understanding them in their place in their lives..in your life.  Oh my, what my life would have been without you in it!  It can't even be imagined.  Whether good or bad...its brought me to the place where I am where I should  be, who I should be and doing what I should be doing.  Looking back on the things that broke my heart...and knowing that it all has become what HE meant for it to become.  Every speck...every being, every memory...a beautiful blessing.  I  hate how I am not able to just let everyone know what they mean in the space of my life...YOU KNOW?  really...I wish I could give my memories to my husband and kids...how they would know me better..through you all.  Some things maybe I would like to tone down a bit...but maybe not.  :)  Living life in full throttle...mistakes made...lessons learned and blessings given.  Oh my glorious God...the blessings given.  You know who you are...and even if you think...maybe she isn't talking about me I didn't know her that well...I"M TALKING ABOUT YOU!  In so many ways I am...don't ever doubt the impact you have on someones life...even in the aisles of Walmart...don't doubt it!  You can choose to make an impression...good or bad...a smile a frown...a look of indifference.  If you see me frowning pop me one...truly...you are are blessing!

Birthday Wishes for Mom

Well , today is my mom's birthday and I just couldn't let it go by without saying what is in my heart. How did I manage to be so wonderfully blessed to be born to my mom some 50 odd years ago? Some of you know her as Gaye, Norma Gaye, Aunt Gaye, Mrs Bippert, Mrs Belcher, Nana and Mom...some of you don't know her at all. But let me tell you what an amazing presence she is in my life. She was there for my dad in his illness and then took on the jobs of both mother and father to my brother and I. She went back to school, got a job and gave us a great life. She cooked breakfast every morning and dinner every night. She sewed dance costumes, school clothes and prom dresses. She had a great job that took her away from home some but she always did the right thing and was always there for us. We went on vacations that I will never forget for as long as I live. She has loved my friends and treated them like they were her own. She's a wonderful cook, throws a great birthday party and is so much fun to be around. She loves deeply and will do all she can for others without asking for anything in return. She does not judge and accepts our weaknesses and for that I'm extremely grateful. She loves her grand children and goes out of her way to do for them daily. I am so thankful that she is my mom and my best friend and that even though I'm not worthy, the good Lord decided that her home was where I should be. I can't even begin to thank or re-pay her for all she has done for me in my life...but just to say. Mom, I love you and am so happy you are my mom. I hope you have a wonderful birthday, even if we are dragging you out of town for a football game instead of throwing you one of your wonderful birthday parties. Happy Birthday Mom!



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Father's Day

I'm sitting here at Port A thinking about the fact that tomorrow is Fathers Day. There are pictures going up on Facebook of my friends fathers. Some passed and missed, others still around being the great dads that they are. I have been extremely lucky in my life. At first it didn't seem so when my wonderful daddy was taken away so young...




He continues to be a blessing in my life and am so blessed to have him as my father.
The good Lord has sent other men into my life since then that I have been so thankful for. Early on after dad died a new family moved into the neighborhood. Ill never forget the first time I saw him. He showed up at our door in full beard and sun tanned skin after returning from a hunt. Woody Glasscock and his family became such an important part of our family. He is loved and missed.




Later mom met her second husband Donald through my grandmother and Papa Joe. Papa joe was Donald's dad and mom and him got together and married. Even at an older age having a new dad was such a blessing. Donald has been an amazing dad and grandpa to us. I thank The Lord everyday that he was placed in our lives.




When I finally met the man of my dreams and father to my own kids, he brought another amazing father into my life. Gerry was such a great man and I truly can't believe how lucky I am to have been considered one of his daughters. We miss him so much.




And Michael...you are an amazing husband and father. I still can't imagine what I ever did to have you come into my life. The good Lord has truly looked out for me and I am truly blessed.




The blessings just keep on coming as a few years ago Renee married a great guy that has just slipped into the role of dad so smoothly...and brought along a wonderful family. Rodney, we are so blessed to have you in our lives and we've already made some great memories.




I can't forget to mention Mitch and Papa Joe...and my grandpa Griggs, oh the memories...thank you grandma for picking so well.



Happy Fathers Day to all dads out there, those that are with God and those that are still with us. Thank you for being such good role models, playmates, and inspirations. We learn from everyone that God places in our lives and He has placed them well in mine.
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